im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
