Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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