Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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