I could make wine with my vomit
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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