i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
