The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
