it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
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