I wish I could punch you in the face.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
