She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize