K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
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