Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
