grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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