he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize
