Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Someone came in the potted fern
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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