Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
