i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Green mimosas i think yes
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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