Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
