and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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