tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
