How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
