I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
