I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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