Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Liz is crying about burritos again.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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