hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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