nut hugger
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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