You can't motorboat a personality
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
