You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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