You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
