Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i already hear my dad disowning me
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
