when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
