If that was your dad, he is hot
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize