I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
