Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
