she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
