is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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