Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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