Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
