Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
