I just threw up on my dentist
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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