Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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