The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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