He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
