If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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