The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
