he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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