We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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