OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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