those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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