He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
