Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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