we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
